Just no copying^^. That's all =)
If you do, i'll make sure u don't again -blink-
Swearing = ok (Y) cos i do it too ><
All work is original except for song lyrics xP
I take no credit for those at all~








Music Code here=)
GetItHere! lalala~ :D

June 2009
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January 2011
March 2011

ok yes i'm slow...it's like been 5 days since he went, but hey its the tought that counts.

well...ah i don't know what to say.

as a kid i used to always listen to his songs, and i thought they were just damn catchy. and even though i didn't understand all those hidden meanings, some of them were quite...<33

as for the man himself, i never really knew what to think about all that crap the media and rumours said about him. All that matters is that he was a great person who undoubtedly changed the world with his music and beliefs.

The following are a few of probably my all-time fav MJ songs. A freaking genius he was <33 (yes i know more than half are jackson 5 songs but they still count no?)

(If you're not bothered...which you probably aren't, don't bother reading)

R.I.P. Michael Jackson

I Want You Back

Uh-huh huh huh huh
Let me tell ya now
Uh-huh

VERSE 1:
When I had you to myself
I didn't want you around
Those pretty faces always made you stand out in a crowd
But someone picked you from the bunch
one glance was all it took
Now it's much too late for me to take a second look

CHORUS:
Oh baby give me one more chance
(show you that I love you)
Won't you please let me
(back in your heart)
Oh darlin' I was blind to let you go
(let you go baby)
But now since I see you in his arms
(I want you back)
Yes I do now
(I want you back)
Ooh ooh baby
(I want you back)
Ya ya ya ya
(I want you back)
Na na na na

VERSE 2:
Tryin' to live without your love
Is one long sleepless night
Let me show you girl
That I know wrong from right
Every street you walk on
I leave tearstains on the ground
Following the girl
I didn't even want around
Let me tell you now

CHORUS:
Oh baby all I need is one more chance
(show you that I love you)
Won't you please let me
(back to your heart)
Oh darlin' I was blind to let you go
(let you go baby)
But now since I see you in his arms

Uh-huh
A buh buh buh buh (2 times)
All I want
A buh buh buh buh
All I need
A buh buh buh buh
All I want
A buh buh buh buh
All I need

JERMAINE: Oh just one more chance
to show you that I love you
baby! (6 times)

(I want you back)
JACKIE: Forget what happened then
(I want you back)
JERMAINE: Let me live again

Oh baby I was blind to let you go
But now since I see you in his arms
(I want you back)
JACKIE: Spare me of this cause
JERMAINE: Gimme back what I lost

Oh baby I need one more chance ha
I tell ya that I love you

Heal The World

(Spoken) Child`s voice: "Think about the generations and they say:We want to make it a better place for our children and our children's children.So that they know it's a better world for them; and think if they can make it a better place."

There's a place in your heart
And I know that it is love
And this place could be much
Brighter than tomorrow
And if you really try
You'll find there's no need to cry
In this place you'll feel
There's no hurt or sorrow

There are ways to get there
If you care enough for the living
Make a little space
Make a better place ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make it a better place
For you and for me

If you want to know why
There's love that cannot lie
Love is strong
It only cares of joyful giving
If we try we shall see
In this bliss we cannot feel
Fear or dread
We stop existing and start living

Then it feels that always
Love's enough for us growing
So make a better world
Make a better world ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

And the dream we were conceived in
Will reveal a joyful face
And the world we once believed in
Will shine again in grace
Then why do we keep strangling life
Wound this earth, crucify its soul
Though it's plain to see
This world is heavenly
Be god's glow

We could fly so high
Let our spirits never die
In my heart I feel you are all my brothers
Create a world with no fear
Together we cry happy tears
See the nations turn their swords into plowshares

We could really get there
If you cared enough for the living
Make a little space
To make a better place ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me
...

There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me
...

You and for me ...

Black or White

I took my baby
On a Saturday bang
Boy is that girl with you
Yes we're one and the same

Now I believe in miracles
And a miracle
Has happened tonight

But, if
You're thinkin'
About my baby
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

They print my message
In the Saturday sun
I had to tell them
I ain't second to none

And I told about equality
An it's true
Either you're wrong
Or you're right

But, if
You're thinkin'
About my baby
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

I am tired of this devil
I am tired of this stuff
I am tired of this business
Sew when the
Going gets rough
I ain't scared of
Your brother
I ain't scared of no sheets
I ain't scare of nobody
Girl when the
Goin' gets mean

(L. T. B. Rap performance)
Protection
For gangs, clubs
And nations
Causing grief in
Human relations
It's a turf war
On a global scale
I'd rather hear both sides
Of the tale
See, it's not about races
Just places
Faces
Where your blood
Comes from
Is where your space is
I've seen the bright
Get duller
I'm not going to spend
My life being a color

(Michael)
Don't tell me you agree with me
When I saw you kicking dirt in my eye

But, if
You're thinkin' about my baby
It don't matter if you're black or white

I said if
You're thinkin' of
Being my baby
It don't matter if you're black or white

I said if
You're thinkin' of
Being my brother
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

Ooh, ooh
Yea, yea, yea now
Ooh, ooh
Yea, yea, yea now

It's black, it's white
It's tough for you
To get by
It's black , it's white, whoo

It's black, it's white
It's tough for you
To get by
It's black , it's white, whoo

Man in the Mirror

I'm gonna make a change,
for once in my life
It's gonna feel real good,
gonna make a diference
Gonna make it right...

As I, turn up the collar on
my favorite winter coat
This wind is blowing my mind
I see the kids in the streets,
with not enought to eat
Who am I to be blind?
Pretending not to see their needs

A summer disregard, a broken bottle top
And a one man soul
They follow each other on the wind ya' know
'Cause they got nowhere to go
That's why I want you to know

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change
(Na na na, na na na, na na, na nah)

I've been a victim of a selfish kind of love
It's time that I realize
That there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan
Could it be really me, pretending that they're not alone

A willow deeply scarred, somebody's broken heart
And a washed-out dream
(Washed-out dream)
They follow the pattern of the wind ya' see
'Cause they got no place to be
That's why I'm starting with me

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Ooh!)
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change


I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Change his ways - ooh!)
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make that..
CHANGE!

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Man in the mirror - Oh yeah!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Better change!)
No message could have been any clearer
(If you wanna make the world a better place)
(Take a look at yourself and then make the change)

(You gotta get it right, while you got the time)
('Cause when you close your heart)
You can't close your... your mind!
(Then you close your... mind!)
That man, that man, that man, that man
With the man in the mirror
(Man in the mirror, oh yeah!)
That man, that man, that man,
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Better change!)
You know... that man
No message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make the change
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Na na na, na na na, na na, na nah
(Ooooh...)
Oh no, no no...

I'm gonna make a change
It's gonna feel real good!
Come on!
(Change...)
Just lift yourself
You know
You've got to stop it,
Yourself!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
I've got to make that change, today!
Hoo!
(Man in the mirror)
You got to
You got to not let yourself...
brother
Hoo!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
You know - I've got to get
that man, that man...
(Man in the mirror)
You've got to
You've got to move! Come on!
Come on!
You got to...
Stand up! Stand up! Stand up!
(Yeah! - Make that change)
Stand up and lift yourself, now!
(Man in the mirror)
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Aaow!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
Gonna make that change...
come on!
You know it!
You know it!
You know it!
You know it...
(Change...)
Make that change.

I'll Be There

You and I must make a pact
We must bring salvation back
Where there is love, I'll be there

I'll reach out my hand to you,
I'll have faith in all you do
Just call my name and I'll be there

Chorus:
And oh - I'll be there to comfort you,
Build my world of dreams around you
I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love that's strong
I'll be your strength, I'll keep holding on
Yes I will, yes I will

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter
Togetherness, well that's all I'm after
Whenever you need me, I'll be there
I'll be there to protect you
With an unselfish love I respect you
Just call my name and I'll be there

(Chorus)

If you should ever find someone new
I know he'd better be good to you
'Cos if he doesn't, I'll be there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah
I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there

(Just look over your shoulders, honey - ooh)

I'll be there, I'll be there, whenever you need me, I'll be
there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah
I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be
there...

Blame It On the Boogie

Blame It On The Boogie

Hee, hee, hee, hee

My baby’s always dancin’ and it wouldn’t be a bad thing
But I don’t get no lovin’ and that’s no lie
We spent the night in Frisco at every kinda disco
From that night I kissed our love goodbye

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

That nasty boogie bugs me, but somehow how it has drugged me
Spellbound rhythm gets me on my feet
I’ve changed my life completely, I’ve seen the lightning leave
me
And my baby just can’t take her eyes off me

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t you blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie, woo

I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet
I just can’t, I just can’t (Yeah)
I just can’t (Woo) control my feet

I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet
I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet

Sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

This magic music grooves me, that dirty rhythm fools me
The devil’s gotten to me through this dance
I’m full of funky fever, a fire burns inside me
Boogie’s got me in a super trance

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t you blame it sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Ow (Sunshine)
Ooh (Moonlight)
Yeah (Good times)
Mmm (Boogie)

You just gotta (Sunshine)
Yeah (Moonlight)
(Good times)
Good times (Boogie)

Don’t you blame it (Sunshine)
You just gotta (Moonlight)
You just wanna (Good times)
Yeah, oh (Boogie)

Blame it on yourself (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie (Good times)
All night long (Boogie)

Can’t stop that boogie (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie (Good times)
Dancin’ all night long (Boogie)

Blame it on yourself (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie, boogie, boogie (Good times)
All night long (Boogie)

~Long live the King of Pop

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life

yeah...i'm over it already =_=. ok not over it....cos it still bothers me heaps.
but if anything, i'm the type who forgets why they were angry to begin with (Y) pathetic isn't it? =_= yeah yeah.

and guess how i'm feeling right now? smitten~! -cue groans, headdesks, and palmfaces-
those 2 of you who know what this is all about, i should get over it shouldn't i? it's quite pathetic. haha...i like using that word now. it's so appropriate. "paTHEtic!" xDDD

-sigh- i'm hopeless. i'm so fking clueless that i probably don't even know how stupid i look from an outsider's POV. in fact, i'm just stupid. full stop. end of story.

ARGH! what's worse is that its one-sided. (Y) yeah great direction this is going isn't it?

since everone is posting up songs on their blogs i should too ^^ nobody knows this song but screw it! its for my own sake ><

presenting!!! -drumroll- the state of my heart >< =_= (the tense isn't right but use your imagination ;P) also the lyrics don't even relate to me....wtf?! =_= I JUST LIKE IT OK! >w<

The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift

He is sensible and so incredible
And all my single friends are jealous
He says everything I need to hear and it's like
I couldn't ask for anything better
He opens up my door and I get into his car
And he says you look beautiful tonight
And I feel perfectly fine

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name
You're so in love that you act insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breakin' down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

He respects my space
And never makes me wait
And he calls exactly when he says he will
He's close to my mother
Talks business with my father
He's charming and endearing
And I'm comfortable

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name
You're so in love that you act insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breakin' down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

He can't see the smile I'm faking
And my heart's not breaking
Cause I'm not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating intoxicating
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now

I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It's 2am and I'm cursing your name
I'm so in love that I acted insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breaking down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you oh, oh

And that's the way I loved you oh, oh
Never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

maybe someday, someday when i cant tell you and laugh about it like it's nothing, i'll tell you. for now, just the thought of you is enough.

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, fail, love

hmmm...its funny. all day, i've had depressing songs stuck in my head...

weelay is sick =( hope u get better soon~! thanks for replying today, and sorry i didn't reply in the arvo. (been too tired ><) will call you soon~ "call me, if you need a friend, call me!" ^^

don't really wanna talk about what happened at school today. that sounds worse than i mean it to be xDDD i mean as in...yeah...

netball training: 6 people there yay^^! record (Y) of course...a certain SOMEONE BIGPOOFACE didn't come of course. HAHA melc and melt told us to flame at her for them. they said they were going to stalk her homephone and talk to her parents (Y) serves you right btch.

lenloe lost her flash file D; i can't sympathize cos i don't do ipt, but there's still empathy... the library compnerds couldn't find it either D; well gl with redoing it. got 1 week extension yeah? =) if it helps, i think the vid is really cute :3

D2MG<33

jap reading. pissed that i didn't remember the word for grapes D; othawise (Y)

science me and lenloe r awsome ^_^ us and our non-calculator calculating :3

on a darker note...maybe it's just me...but nothing i do anymore seems to sit right with people. no matter what i do, even if it's alright if other people do it, it's like they HAVE to oppose me. i'm melodramatizing i know...but that's the feeling i'm getting. it's just not fair that i'm being judged cos of what i decide to pursue. there's that judging thing again. yeah, it just seems that nowadays, you have to make everyone else happy before you can think about yourself. yes i'm selfish, deal with it. and it's also not fair that the only un-involved person who seems to be supportive is because she's got that same interest. and on THAT note, THANK YOU~!<33 we both had a bad day (yours was worse of course ><) and i'm glad we pulled through somehow. thank you for being so supportive -hug-

ah...its 6pm. just woke up from falling asleep for 2 hrs >< very exhausted for some reason...

haha yeah... anywayz...where was i? D; oh right. yeah <33 you very much^^

lei dei gum do yee geen, lei dei zi gei hui cham ga la. ngo dei yee ging mun go lei dei go go lah dan hai lei dei zhi gei wa mm hui ga. so yee mm how wa ngo dei mow mun go lei dei ah! mm hai ngo dei go cho lei ga! mm how yee wai ngo mo geen dow lei dei yi ga heng dow 'bar' gun ngo ah.

ARGH SHIT...got so much crap to finish before thursday.
ok...TO DO LIST!

*Drama Journal - fked for cos i havnt started and need to do a term's worth of entries before thursday D;
*SRP Log Book - also fked for cos i'm capped and can't do research x(
*Jap notes for me/lenloe - shouldn't be too hard. killing 2 birds with one stone (Y)
*English Script for Mice and Men - GROUP MEETING GUYS!!! D;

still not quite satisfied with that rant. might post again tonight. if bothered.

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, friends, life, school

ok yes i know i epic fail T_T right after "getting back on track" i have failed again. well got shit net to blame ^^;; yeah and also being very cbf and late nights (Y) -sigh- ok here we go...MASS recap again D;

~Friday June 26 2009~
carumen-chan sick. get beta soon~!

nothing much during the day. 1st period maths; the usual. Do the work in class then never do hw (Y) well i guess venn diagrams and two way tables are't THAT bad =_=. oh well, in all uneventful.

English, as usual: BLUDGE xDDD ok well we were supposed to be doing work. developing of mice and men into play @_@ and we have till (as of today) this thursday/friday to finish the scene (Y) fked yes. AHAHAHAHA ms seeto and her "tree blowing in the wind -waves arms around- river -octopus arms in front- and dead squashed mouse -cowers under arms-" xDDDDDD oh well...the freaking year 7/8 in te gym who repeatedly played Unfaithful by Rihanna weren't helping >[. we ended up talking about formal i think xDDD

Recess...i'm sorry T_T it was too long ago so i don't remember....><

Drama, yes we got congratulated yadayadayada. then we did commedia (Y) why do i always end up t=playing the old men? D; last year i did the big fat doctor, this time i get to be the captain wuss. T_T my neck hurts from being slammed on the 'bed' so many times xDDDD

Lunch: cath and shirley had brandy snap ^w^ like caramel toffee except chewy >w< very yummy. then there was the cool chocolate squiggly things (Y) xDDD love scabbing off ft ppl ^w^

History was dodge!! xDDD had mr culver for a sub, then spent the rest of the lesson copying steph/angel's work to 'check off'. >< hey i actually forgot my folder!! not my fault D; ok it is ><

science was fail cos i didnt have my folder D;. need to copy notes off weelay >< trivia...got owned xDDD

after school had rehearsal for Gala night concert. freaking jnr choir...JUST COS U HAVE SO MANY PPL...D; i only realised how small snr vocal and yr 10 vocal are when we were on stage... haha oh well. i hate singing the chorus in 'in the mood' D; so hard to get the rght note for the first line. and STILL cant get the freaking lyrics... "oh JOY, FLOY DOY, oh BOY!" OMGOMGOMGOMG >[ newayz. then we had a bit of a fail self-conducted rehearsal outside. >< alto 2's so outnumbered...FOUR! FOUR OF US!! D;

went back inside to watch jnr choir singing glory of love xDD tried recording it...then roser kept restarting them at "OOOOOOHAAAAAHHH BABADOOBOW~!" garg i ended up with like 10 vids of them doing that >[. then lenloe and weelay went out making a fashion statement with their skirt tops xDDD very nice guys (Y)

had chick'n grill for dinner ^w^ shared potatobake with weely (Y) then changing in the civic centre toilets O_O got perved on...freaking fail lock on the cubicle door...YOU COULD TURN IT FROM OUTSIDE >[. gargh...

got back to gala, got more and more high ^w^. cam high xDDD cool vids of people singing. GIB FTW! (girls in black ><) xDDD yes i will upload these on fb as soon as i'm not capped D;

i think we sang alrite...i hope we sang alright O_O season of love = <33. i still felt like i was off tune in in the mood >< damn man. and apparently i was RIGHT next to the podium mic so...YES I WAS AMPLIFIED T__________T bro and stella both said they could hear me D; gargh....

speaking of my bro...HIS NAME GOT DRAWN FOR THE RAFFLE HAMPER!!! xDDD lucky betch...

yesh that's all for friday...FINALLY! dw...it's the weekend now, won't be too long ;P

~Saturday June 27 2009~
Netball. What else? xDDD Year 9 babies (haha ok that's weird calling them that O_O) my year 9 team are AWESOME! i don't care if monte steroids beat you...it was only by TWO! 2 POINTS I TELL YOU! so you're still awesome!! ^w^ and also good job thrashing wenona^^

as for my own team...apparently we plyed well, despite losing...as always >< oh well i play for the ake of playing (Y) xDD currently VERY pissed at DAIS for skipping out...FREAKING HELL IF YOU'RE GONNA SIGN UP THEN COMMIT TO THE TEAM! JEEZ! fking slacker...i feel sorry for our coach.

watched a bit of coaches' game afterwards. PRO-NESS~! >< so good^^ melt is an awesome defender...she puts her body on the line as melc said xDDD and melc is so aggro its scary xDDD but its good (Y)

went a little looking around at chats afterwards. pretty light bluey aqua dress with reali nice colour and material (chiffon)...but in 2 sizes too big D; and mum says it makes me look fat (Y) (foto...didnt actually buy it ><)

ok thats all thank god.

~Sunday June 28 2009~

err...forgot what i did...

OH THATS RIGHT!! lol it as only yesterday >< ok...so...woke up at 11:30...got out of bed at 11:30 i think >////< then me and mum went to eastwood to do stuff (Y) where i got new haircut ^w^. fringe...wow...3rd time in life having a fringe (Y) (2-3 yrs old, beginning of yr 8, and now) feels weird...i looked down at the floor and there was like a WHOLE FRIKKN PILE of hair xDDDDD i think hairdresser must've been tired xDD (blue star<33) he sed i shud come back every 3 months. guy knows how to do business xDDDD but no D; like i'd be stuffd ><

went with mum to cafe de macau of lunch/arvo tea, and had cheapass arvo tea set xDDD. but twas nice ^w^ (buttermilk pancakes with deep fried chicken wings, potato salad and...something else xDDD + red bean ice ^w^)

procrastinated wen i got home (Y) webcammed with weelay and she liked the cut xDDD reaction was funny xDDD

FINALLY!! ~Monday June 29 2009~
YES! FINALLY! WOOH! ok fine ill get on with it ><

uhm...got 2 school earli for scram. saw ms achelle, nobodythere yet D;.
then ness got here, and i went out of comp room and said hi xDDDD she didn't reply D; after the 3rd hi, she's like "OH! OMG I DIDN'T RECOGNISE YOU!" hehe...score 1!

scrammed. people late xDDD (Y) gg guys^^

drama presented the commedia play. argh i fail as a man (Y) which is...normal? xDD the other group's play was absolutely hilarious xDDD

geo, still managed to not present our ppt (Y) hehe relying on handouts... -shift-

Ate my lunch at recess T_T fail~

Commerce: watched the case bout lindy chamberlain. so horrible D;

ah...its 12:01am...GOOD MORNING EVRYONE xDDDDD (Y)

Lunchtime did commerce with log and Elaie...well watched them do commerce >< didnt help much D;

Rollerblading = LAST LESSON! D; will missh you TOM~! so instead we did cool tricks all day ^w^ Tom brought out the big boys (rip stick, skateboard, scooters, and lots of other kool stuff) and offered $50 to whoever could ride those funny metal wheel things...>< nobody could (Y) THEN ME AND CARUMEN-CHAN DID THE RAMP ON BLADES!! ^w^ SO FUN!! xDDDDDDD stacked it on the bum the first time though =\ tried to show shirley the ropes, then she got grazed D; stupid loose pads...

me and weelay changed for dance (hehe weelay...SAGGY PANTS! xDDD) then took train to central with bella. we started doing this weird bobbing thing ("yo sup!" -bobbobobob-)xDDD to do to cdrew (hehe not sus at all) if we bumped into him. got to central, saw lots of sbs...no cdrew D; poor weelay. friends of her saw him, and friends of his saw her, but they missed each other. yes next time we'll need 2 change earlier xDDD.

waited 4 yale and lawrence for a while, walked a long way to...bookshop? =\ yeh wth xDDD bella and weelay avid fans of the 'SEX' section xDDDDDD leave me out of this guys xDDD bella left halfway through.

we then walked around to chinatown, where we went into a dodgy coffee lounge with betchy waitresses =\ food wasnice though (chicken and mushroom omelette ^w^). red bean ice was quite literally...RED BEAN + ICE...(ok throw in a bit of milk there). >< very dodge (Y) cdrew a bit dow gei by now ;P yale and lawrence apparently didnt wanna come up to top floor, but then we were broke (ok short...not broke xDDD) so we went (yes, down) to ask yale to borrow. ended up coming back up, after we decided lawrence wasn't gonna jump out othe toilets off the building xDDDD yale is so...(communist) azn xDDD (Y) shouted us. THANK YOU~!

yale and lawrence 'walked' us to dancekool...then decided to come up after seeing the bookshop sign in the same building =_= yaow di gwai gwai shu shu...=\

dance was awesome fun today ^w^ not noob is a good feeling (Y). jaye so cute ^w^ no i'm not hitting on him...he's shorter than me i think xDDDD must check next time. and was quite tired afterwards cos we werent lost today so we could go full out! wooh hi5 weelay!

saw liwai gege while walking to town hall xDDD haha random. i wonder if he thought i was a random, since the hair didn't help. xDD

a very special person taught me tonight/this morning to have more faith in guys. i guess i should. haha but...it's so ironic...>w< nvm. tonight, someone made me very happy. i don't know if you'll ever read this, but thanks.

Labels: emotions, fail, friends, school

yeah...it took a while but im bak -dramatic music-

so...today... was late to snr vocal cos i had an argument with mum T_T sorry guys...but vocal was fun^^ we're kinda screwd 4 gala...oh well? xDDD and omg T_T apparently ppl aren't coming 2 gala anymore~! T_T like...carumen-cahn cant come...lenloe can't come, celia wont come, elaine wont come, weelay wont come, and...T____________T im gonna be all alone!!! please come ppl...otherwise you woke up early all those days for NOTHING! GOT TO SCHOOL AT 8 FOR NOTHING~! =(

history...so freakng exhausted from last night. _T lenloe hit me with a book on the head >< you coud've just shaken me awake T_T meanie~ xDD

geo: epic fail~ xDDDD we like fully ignored mr passlow. (D; not coswe're mean...we were just reali er...cbf? we got ONE presentation done in the WHOLE period xDDDDD fail much?

at recess...ms mcmahon and seeto made us clean up from drama night. =_= as if we werent tired enugh. had fun squishing boxes to put in recycling xDD (Y) the bell rung as soon as i got to the atom D;

english was SUCH a bludge xDDD...as always? ;P yay^^ we're doing a play for mice and men...i dont noe why im happy bout that but i am? >< beta than writing...we're doing the scene where curley's wife gets killed =O JESS BE LENNIE~! xDDDDD

forgot to buy a hoodie at lunch T_T MUST remember tomorrow. with carumen-chan helped lenloe revise for jap 'listening' test at lunchtime (ended up being reading xDDDD (Y) ) my chicken tender wrap = <33 ^w^ thnk yu mum for being an AWESOME cook xDDD

maths...got busted T_________T i reali didnt notice myself falling asleep T_T it was relai stuffy.... and no steffu...it wasnt ur fault either ;P D; btu srsly...i feel reali bad. it shudnt be your job to wake me up steffu T_T i REALLY need to sleep... anywayz...miss v fully owned me D; embrassing...

commerce...err...pseaud (still don't know how to spell her name =_=) ctl. saw weelay and bella doing mando (Y)so exhausted that i fell asleep >< IM SORRYYYYYYYYYYY~!! T_T drama night killed me >< then after, turned out that weelay gave me bak the rong PE shirt xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD ikenw it felt different ;P now i need to dig through all my dodge laundry and find it (Y) xDDD

must persuade al to go formal shopping ^w^

talked on mobile wth lenloe/carumen-chan/elaine/celia/kenneth whie walking home xDDDD V2V FREE MINUTES FTW~! ^w^ clara and my brother sed i looked crazy cos i was talking o myyself T_____T JUST COS I WAS USING EARPHONES DAMNIT!! D;

yay for banana walnut muffins straight out of the oven ^w^

GOOD LUCK ALL IPTers/E.HISTORY PPL!! (esp. Lenloe!) GANBATTE~!

edit: lenloe didnt hit me with a book - it was her hand xDDDD and she didnt do it on purpose <33

~<33 beedee

Labels: friends, life, school

yes...i know i know...i fail T_T almost a week without posting.

sorry... i just really hav been cbf. i've been bored/busy so...yeah you get the point.

so...brief recap of days missed:
*Saturday - netball cancelled (woot! a bit cbf on the day =_=) cos of the rain. spent the rest of day procrastinating.

*Sunday - FORMAL SHOPPING!!!<33 went to bondi junction with weelay and steffu. i wasn't late!!! ^_^ caught bus from townhall there. so fail iceskaters xDDDD DOMINO EFFECT!! xDDDDDD and we thought up a way of getting everone off the ice >w<: remotely lift the ice up and tip everyone off (Y)

xDDD got to bondi and were like O_O how do you get to westfield. found the place eventually (Y). Freaking huge place it is, like...rich-ass people D; wandered around a bit: nice shops, dodgy shops, hardcore shops, pretty dresses, holey dresses.

In DJs we camwhored with mac comps xDDD hilarious fx (Y) ^w^ FREAKING HELL Steffu ur so skinny D; so jealous~ T_T what's tight on me is like LOOSE on you D; anywayz, CHANGEROOM SESSION! ^^ tried on a few dresses including dodgy red dress which was WAAAAY too low xDDD AH! and gradient dresses<33 xDDDD freaking expensive though. and the 'shelly' dress<33 i think the shop staff person was like "O_o wtf are they doing in there?" cos she asked us if we were ok a few times -shifty- xDD.

i think we then went to lunch. had okonomiyaki (jap pancake)<33 ^w^ yummy^^ and steffu and weelay had nachos -shift- and since i was still hungry got a taco as well (Y) and weelay and steffu asked for the wiggly chips so bought those to share (Y) really yummy~ ^w^

then went to myer<33 if was to give any advice, definitely the best place to look for dresses ^w^ not including formal shops i guess. when i was looking back on the photos i took while we tried dresses on...its so funny how many shots there are of renee half out of a dress xDDDD camera loves you ;P and steffu not fitting into boob(y) dresses xDDDDD covered up for the fotos (Y)pretty wedding-like dress and steffu's cute navy wavy dress (ahahaha i just realised how funny that sounds) then we wnt with steffu to go to rubi shoes for black flats, but didnt get them.

and evntually...ended up getting one from myer (Y). sorry i took so long deciding weelay D; haha and the boob-hole dress xDDDD nice colour though<33

so...yay? ^^

*monday: I WAS EARLY FOR SNR VOCAL!!! BOOYAH! >< ok its not that big of a deal. but its a big achievement >< and the i was very fascinated by vianna's ring-watch xDDD
then we had a full dress rehearsal which ran through 2nd period...uhm...wgat else...ah maths! ^^ miss v bak! proper teacher -shift- but now i have to do work >< cos the teacher actually knows me.

rollerblading quite normal. tom wasn't late ;P had a 'test' whre evryone 'passed' xDD dodgy exercises....AND OMG! FLARTING sed to carumen-chan "stop showing off!!!" in an authorative teacherish voice. betch...as if you're not. "oh...wait is this how you do it?" jeez...WE pay school fees to do this you know!!! go to manly skates and find tom if you're so despo!! >[ besides you're taking away our learning time >P haha^^ rant much?

then me and Weelay went dance. so hungry we wanted something to eat. so we bought train tickets first to be sure...then SHIT! we onli had 55c xDDDD so we went to maccers and saw JOJO!^w^ wanted a discount but she was broke D; so we shared a soft serve xDDDDDDDDDDDDD and ate it with spoons. >w< must've looked reali awkward and weird, cos we were walking down george st while eating it xDDD.

so yeah, dance...one word...FAIL~! D; couldn't even find the place xDDD we were SO lost >< then we got there...and SO freaking intimidating D; all ppl such pros...and we were just like O_O yup (Y) we're...uh...new...so...O_O xDDD completely lost >< met a nice girl called trish (uni sudent) who helped us<33 even during warmup we were unco xDD then came the routine D; i was so hopeless. kept doing the wrong moves.

jaye is nice (Y) xDDD like a kid. he's got a reali cute face too >w< and NO i am not perving on the dance teacher O_o heh heh...not at all -shift- xDDD nah he's kool (Y) he says we should be more sexy than him when dancing....O_O bullcrap! like that's possible!! he's so frekaing pro D; anyway. in all it was really fun ^w^ can't wait till next lesson. meanwhile gotta practice the routine. ganbarimasu~

and since we starved ourselves being poor, i got home and STUFFD my face (Y) ^^

*tuesday: hmm...what happened...oh that's right. got to school early...crashed IPTers >< then...i thought scram wasn't on cos i thought it was in ft1 T_T sorry guys. then during non-scripture gen-earth had bake sale and scabbed off ppl (stil hadn't refilled wallet from yesterday xDDD) assembly very -packed- lots of vids ^w^ epic drama night vid. OMG!!! ^w^ yr 12 snr challenge encore hiphop dancers SO AWSOME!!! D; then they said there'd be hiphop from nxt term onwards (found out tday its gonna be $8) wanna go~ besides gotta lose wight (Y) workout~! wooh~ ^^

uhm...jap no test -phew- commerce started group assessment. D; i dont think L really likes E and S much...i dont know why D; buti dont wanna tell her not to... since it's up to her. but, argh i dont know ><. drama, focus and random exercises in ampitheatre. ms mcmahon is SO fking scary T_T and geo AHAHAHA fully crammed during lunchtime to do presentation...then didn't do it xDDDDD pseaud (or however the hell you spell her name) had us (Y) studied multiculturalism =_=

*thank you chandrew for being a kind/sweet bf for weelay, so we could've ( if we had) do presentation ^^

thank you mum for buying pretty shoes^w^

wednesday: netball before school - only 3 people turned up >< terry needs to be more aggro!! >< GANBATTE~! full day drama reheasal. freaking running behind schedule. like an HOUR behind schedule. =_= fail. plays turned out pretty well. i think i'm blinded by all teh stage lights. -blinkblink- and then me and niki got spung a polished impro to fill in an interlude...FREKAING HELL! like the AFTERNOON before the SHOW!! T_T suck at impro...but we got it down ^^ was really annoed that they threw out all the bacon mash potato after full dress rehearsal D; it was NICE~!<33 then they threw all the dirty cutlery in T______T NOOOOO~ MA MASH~!

ordered and picked up pizza after school with elaine, wheeza and emily. ^w^ hahaha simply CHEEEEEEEEEESE<33 and the fail double bacon chesseburger which we found an OLIVE in!! xDDDD so fail~ this BLACK thing in the middle of the slice. we were like O_O...BWAHAHAHAHA!! xDDD newayz, it was kool, just eating pizza and chatting ^w^ and go em's little brother daniel...could hear him on phone "...yeah." xDDD

had so much time to waste before the performance. then got into costume. powdered hair with baby powder >< the smelled horrible. and then everytime i tapped my head this cloud of smoke would fly out xDDD and i just realised how hard it is bein a girl being a guy. cos for guys normally wen they go toilet they just -open-. but for girls you have to undo belt, sit down, .....-something-.... stand up, tuck shirt in whiel trying not to tuck suit jacket in, redo belt, then flush. -panting- frekaing hell, takes longer than being a girl. =_= hair colour kept 'fading apparently' so jihu and cici (well more jihu xDDDD) went crazy with the powder. hopefullyhad the right effect =L

then the night started!! (DC came ^w^ reali surprised =O) opened the show...me and niki so nervous. almost cracked up while i was walking down the aisle xDDDD niki did awsome opening speech.

other class's plays were awesome. LOVED the maccers one<33 so funny. ting and judy so epic. the dirnks were scary D; T______T so creeped out...poor mish xDDDD got fully owned.

then at interval me and niki 'mingled' xDDD supposed to stay in character...failed at that (Y) argh my hair was so embarassing T_T. then we opened second part of night after interval. my argument with niki (the polished impro). so freaking scared i wud stuff it up. but the audience laughed!!!!<33 ^_^ thank god...

me yourself and i...REALLY wanted to see it on stage T_T but cast weren't allowed to in the crowd...but the audience liked it so...hopefully it was good? still...really wanted to see my script being performed T_T oh well, i saw bits of it during rehearsals<33 love that cute scene at the end where elaine and wheeza go off holding hands<33 good job guys (Y)

corner store, beginning is so epic xDDD its like...they're so random that you got to laugh xDD ah stella and wendy. such a deep play =O. REALLY good job - only 2 actors man!

and then us...OMG!!! T_T was so fking nervous...couldn't think straight. the audience got into it with the rock music 'radio' at the beginning xDDDD could hear them clapping in time ^^ wonder if joy was 'bobbing' =L i stuffed up 2 lines T_T. i dont think the audience laughed as much as we would've liked them to...but then again i supposed our play isn't that funny. and then they were like "ooooooooooh" wwhen the bowl smashed xDDD yay. and guess what?! i broke the glass when i slammed the table xDDD didn't even realise till we were cleaning up. >< anywayz...i hope they liked it ^w^ cutain call was so epic...half of them didn't what to do cos the other class wasn't here when we rehearsed it =_= oh well...(apparently DC was gonna run up on stage xDDDD funny guy...)

afterwards met up with cath, lenloe, weelay, carumen-chan, steffu and DC. hope they liked it...? then we had 2 pack up...so freking tired. cbf.

went home fell asleep.

and guesswat?! i havnt even written for TODAY yet D; i'll do it in anuther post.

i am NEVER recapping again. T_T

~<33 beedee

Labels: fail, friends, life, school

...what do you do when mutual interests clash?

that sounded a bit dodge...but i guess that kinda sums it up. can't say what it's actually about...but let's say...there's only one of one thing...and you and your friend both desire it... what happens from there? D;

i should back away. i probably will. in fact, my friend probably as more right to it anyway. i'm just an outsider. i don't know...it seems for some reason unfair if i go for it now. perhaps it's a sense of obligation? >< i don't know...

it's just that when i think about this...i feel majorly unconfortable and...i don't know >< HELP ME~!!!!

edit: i just realised how stupid this sounds...well lets just say its a lot more complicated than i've made it sound ><

Labels: emotions, friends

not much to say...cso wasn't with u guys for most of today D;

late 2 snr vocal T_T felt like an idiot walking in like that...>< sorry 2 let u guys down...and more dodgy actions (Y) xDDDDD

carumen chan and elena - hope u weren't lonely today D;

commerce excursion in city - tagged along with elaine, sally and log^^ weather was reali fail =_= started raining wen we walked 2 circular quay...and yay 4 heavier bag cos i brought an umbrella (Y) xDD. law courts - not enugh time >< fell asleep in one of the cases T_T and the security guard caught me...sleeping...and teased me for it as i went out T^T yeah i need 2 start sleeping... >[ justice and police museum, Judy is (Y) at court monitoring xDDDD hilarious. theres so many disturbig cases, esp the murder ones... 8 yr old kid man!! D; R.I.P all of you. ><

hot hawaiian pizza is nice on a winter's afternoon (Y) ;d

uneventful day, uneventful post D; hopefully will have more to write about soon~

~<33 beedee

Labels: life

yes we are men (Y) xDDD as ms cleggie says.

*edit for yesterday: CARUMEN-CHAN wearing STOCKINGS!! ^_^ 1st time in 4eva! very fem (Y)

hmm...i dont remember wat we did 2day?

oh thats right. i am discovering the art of T9 (Y) haha not really O_O. just that after 6 years of using a mobile phone, i am finally admitting that i am a slow txter (Y) so last night i finally surrendered to T9 and spent an hour adding words to dictionary...sad much? xDDD

this morning...late T_T literally saw the last train that would get me to school on time leave the platform as i ran down the stairs. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" (cue slow motion playback, zoom in on train leaving andhand outreached) yes i'm feeling very melodramatic today xDDD. then, after, got to maths and seniors drag me off to report a late school bus. xDDD shifty yeah. oh well. got off a late note so (Y). ^_^

then lo and behold! guess who the sub-sub (sub for sub of miss v ;D) is? ^_^ its the maths sub we stalked in the quad last year on Jeans for genes day!! yes i still have the vid (Y) which was also the day carmen ghosted BRADY xDDDD. yeah, the one who busted me for filming her...T_T thank gawd she didn't recognise me...and then i bludged maths (Y) as always. didn't bother sinning, cosing or tanning (Y) xDDD

hmmm...science....BLUDGE!!! xDDD yes....txtbook work 4 half an hour (*note, Celia sings a lot of the things she says ;D very cute) then 'help setting up for yr 12 prac test' (which took...half a minute?) then HALF AN HOUR OF (literally Mr Kulesz said: ) BLUDGE!!! woot! xDDDD me and weelay went walkabout (Y) and then 3 of us (lenloe, weelay and me) talk about guys -coughspecificsomeonecough- and different types of 'love'...haha yeah - comittment, passion, intimacy and 'perfect' (yeh i know right? perfect my ass =_=)

guys having girl bestfriends are so hopeless =_= get a clue man...

the talk about guys got me thinking: why do guys think we're so complex? well...i guess maybe we are...but...aren't guys kinda complicated as well? well...some of them -shift-. hey don't blame me, i haven't exactly had the experience ><. well maybe its cos i'm naive, but personally i never have been able to read guys. not that it try to xDDD "I don't attempt to understand the male mind!" ;P -sigh- gawd i dont know...maybe i DO need a bf =_= i don't deny that i'd like the intimacy...>w< like i've said...i'm a srsly hopeless romantic...like to be loved ^w^. but i dont know if i'm ready for a relationship either. i just don't know how i'd fare in a relationship. =\ i'm also really scared of being rejected O_O selfish i know, but its the truth. so socially deprived =_= wait...wth am i talking about? sad much? >< -sigh- jeez i'm not the expert here...;P

yay^^ snr vocal and yr 10 acapella both get group fotos this yr^_^ vball too...>< but i dont know if im included in that D; we should have peer mediation/SCRAm photos too~! >] oh well ><

wet atom at recess D; decided on going formal shopping this Sunday? or was it Saturday? O_O well me Weelay and Steffu newayz. Nemore takers? xDDD planning on going bondi j <33 and strand again mebbe?

PE touch footy...haha fun^_^ our team owns! xDDD then we had

double english after lunch >< you know i still haven't read past chapter one in mice and men =_= THAT's how fail i am (Y) gg much? and hence...yeah i haven't started the 3 pages of questions we're supposed to do either (Y) Ms Seeto rambled again xDDD this time about food/ex-schools taught at. hehe "Of Mice and Men is important because its about the LACK of CAKES~!" xDDD
*TO ALL THOSE NOT IN 10B: how do you pronounce the following name: LA-A xDDDDDDD hav fun xDDD

Then wide reading...omg we're fucked T_T 2 weeks till assessment!! i only JUST starteed Dracula damnit!!! D;

talked to Al about formal on train ^_^ she said she might not go D; she BETTER go!!! >]

stuffed my face when i got home... the pizza for dinner later =_= i'll be lucky if i don't upsize when we got formal shopping this wkend >< REALLY need those hiphop lessons (Y) can't wait!!! ^w^

commerce excursion tomorrow =_= so pointless...plus we have to take notes for assignment as well T_T law courts...woot O_o i can't believe we miss out on mufti AND teacher theatresports for THIS T_T

newayz. that's all for today? feel like writing more... maybe i'll post again later tonight (Y) ok seeya soon~!

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life, love, school

not much to say today. =\

ISCF concert was pretty cool. ^_^ i'm not religious or anything, but i was really happy to see jassy and all the iscf/scripture people having so much fun and so passionate about their religion. no seriously, they looked so, at peace (apart from the blaring loud music in the background xDDD). The band was awesome as well - the songs they played were very meaningful and...catchy? xDDD <33 keep smiling guys!!

got raped at lunch =) ok the combination of that dodgy sentence and the emote make it SUPER dodge but meh. xDD and NO we were not raping each other ;P you WISH we were xDDD jokes jokes. 'you cannot rape the willing' ;P nah...i'm just very ticklish that's all >< then got gangbanged in the end O_O xDDD

commerce...screw the new semester assignment T_T 30 frikkn % weighting... and first part starts on thursday wen we go to court xDDD yes we are all convicted =O

drama night soon~ >< street theatre on monday...gonna be owned T_T dont laugh, please guys. oh and also!!^^ not that there hasn't been enough promotion, but COME TO DRAMA NIGHT PPL!!! ^_^ we wanna fill up the whole hall!!

thanks to bella for lending me her coat.<33 twas very warm ^w^ apparently i look authorative in it xDDD i think i look fat D; yes, even black cant save me ><

yay for people who walk home in the rain! ^_^ <33cath and lauren

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life, school

Labels: fail, friends, life

argh F**K! all of what it typed just got deleted!!! T_T great way to start yeah? T_T ok so...-sigh- starting again...

11:17pm, 14th June 2009: officially start blogging^^lame title much? ><><>[went to work today. nah nothing impressive. just working for dad at comp market. need the pay though. fully broke after not working during musical T_T. i should find a part time. year 10 is expensive^^;;

tomorrow...is school...haha no shataye? >< damn i'm screwed...so what have i got?
*drama - costume and costume design (crap...T_T damn drama night)
*geo - errr...hw? (not that i'll do it =_= i'm just writing this so that when i reread this post i'll feel guilty...as i should! T_T)
*commerce - errr...bring in excursion note? jeez we've only been watching law videos =_=
*sport - rollerbalding!! er... = bring deo? xDD wait...wat?! O_O no...bLAding xDDD

yay^^ Weelay wants 2 go dance next week!! -hug- i really am happy. i actually enjoy dancing ^w^ and also cos i've never actually learnt non-ballet/contemporary dance before. i've always wanted to learn hiphop...but i guess nobody really cares right? ^^;; well whatever, it's just that it would be nice to start learning again after 5 years. yes xDDD contrary to common belief, i haven't learnt dance in 5 years. so it'll be nice to start again <33 thank u weelay!!

craving chocolate. hehe...yes that lindt bunny WOULD look a lot more attractive without the ears. hmm how about without the head? xDDD see...THIS is why i had trouble zipping up the size [...] dress (although xDDD that zipper didn't zip up that well even when i wasnt in it) -sigh- damn my sweet tooth.

ah...yeah there is one more thing i should say. i really <33 my group. i'm not saying this cos i wanna be patronized. i really do think they're the awesomest ever. i honestly can say that i've never been happier with other another group of school friends. i'm not saying they're perfect - who IS O_o? but...i wouldn't change a single one of them. Because...they make me who i am. and they've helped me...grow? O_O ok no...xDD more like mature. ironic isn't it? i'm the oldest xDDD

argh crap. mum/dad turned off the net. i'll probably go turn it back on just so i can post this...but i have to wait till their lights are off. -sigh- see? i'm a bad kid D;

oh f**k....just realised....reports tomorrow T_T oh fml ^^;;

hmm...yeah i tihnk that's all for now. to anybody bothered reading this: how's that? hope i didn't bore you to tears ><

so this is be[d] signing out for the first time, at 11:49pm!^^ cu again soon!!<33

Labels: friends, life

ok yes i'm slow...it's like been 5 days since he went, but hey its the tought that counts.

well...ah i don't know what to say.

as a kid i used to always listen to his songs, and i thought they were just damn catchy. and even though i didn't understand all those hidden meanings, some of them were quite...<33

as for the man himself, i never really knew what to think about all that crap the media and rumours said about him. All that matters is that he was a great person who undoubtedly changed the world with his music and beliefs.

The following are a few of probably my all-time fav MJ songs. A freaking genius he was <33 (yes i know more than half are jackson 5 songs but they still count no?)

(If you're not bothered...which you probably aren't, don't bother reading)

R.I.P. Michael Jackson

I Want You Back

Uh-huh huh huh huh
Let me tell ya now
Uh-huh

VERSE 1:
When I had you to myself
I didn't want you around
Those pretty faces always made you stand out in a crowd
But someone picked you from the bunch
one glance was all it took
Now it's much too late for me to take a second look

CHORUS:
Oh baby give me one more chance
(show you that I love you)
Won't you please let me
(back in your heart)
Oh darlin' I was blind to let you go
(let you go baby)
But now since I see you in his arms
(I want you back)
Yes I do now
(I want you back)
Ooh ooh baby
(I want you back)
Ya ya ya ya
(I want you back)
Na na na na

VERSE 2:
Tryin' to live without your love
Is one long sleepless night
Let me show you girl
That I know wrong from right
Every street you walk on
I leave tearstains on the ground
Following the girl
I didn't even want around
Let me tell you now

CHORUS:
Oh baby all I need is one more chance
(show you that I love you)
Won't you please let me
(back to your heart)
Oh darlin' I was blind to let you go
(let you go baby)
But now since I see you in his arms

Uh-huh
A buh buh buh buh (2 times)
All I want
A buh buh buh buh
All I need
A buh buh buh buh
All I want
A buh buh buh buh
All I need

JERMAINE: Oh just one more chance
to show you that I love you
baby! (6 times)

(I want you back)
JACKIE: Forget what happened then
(I want you back)
JERMAINE: Let me live again

Oh baby I was blind to let you go
But now since I see you in his arms
(I want you back)
JACKIE: Spare me of this cause
JERMAINE: Gimme back what I lost

Oh baby I need one more chance ha
I tell ya that I love you

Heal The World

(Spoken) Child`s voice: "Think about the generations and they say:We want to make it a better place for our children and our children's children.So that they know it's a better world for them; and think if they can make it a better place."

There's a place in your heart
And I know that it is love
And this place could be much
Brighter than tomorrow
And if you really try
You'll find there's no need to cry
In this place you'll feel
There's no hurt or sorrow

There are ways to get there
If you care enough for the living
Make a little space
Make a better place ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make it a better place
For you and for me

If you want to know why
There's love that cannot lie
Love is strong
It only cares of joyful giving
If we try we shall see
In this bliss we cannot feel
Fear or dread
We stop existing and start living

Then it feels that always
Love's enough for us growing
So make a better world
Make a better world ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me

And the dream we were conceived in
Will reveal a joyful face
And the world we once believed in
Will shine again in grace
Then why do we keep strangling life
Wound this earth, crucify its soul
Though it's plain to see
This world is heavenly
Be god's glow

We could fly so high
Let our spirits never die
In my heart I feel you are all my brothers
Create a world with no fear
Together we cry happy tears
See the nations turn their swords into plowshares

We could really get there
If you cared enough for the living
Make a little space
To make a better place ...

Heal the world
Make it a better place
For you and for me
And the entire human race
There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me
...

There are people dying
If you care enough for the living
Make a better place for you and for me
...

You and for me ...

Black or White

I took my baby
On a Saturday bang
Boy is that girl with you
Yes we're one and the same

Now I believe in miracles
And a miracle
Has happened tonight

But, if
You're thinkin'
About my baby
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

They print my message
In the Saturday sun
I had to tell them
I ain't second to none

And I told about equality
An it's true
Either you're wrong
Or you're right

But, if
You're thinkin'
About my baby
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

I am tired of this devil
I am tired of this stuff
I am tired of this business
Sew when the
Going gets rough
I ain't scared of
Your brother
I ain't scared of no sheets
I ain't scare of nobody
Girl when the
Goin' gets mean

(L. T. B. Rap performance)
Protection
For gangs, clubs
And nations
Causing grief in
Human relations
It's a turf war
On a global scale
I'd rather hear both sides
Of the tale
See, it's not about races
Just places
Faces
Where your blood
Comes from
Is where your space is
I've seen the bright
Get duller
I'm not going to spend
My life being a color

(Michael)
Don't tell me you agree with me
When I saw you kicking dirt in my eye

But, if
You're thinkin' about my baby
It don't matter if you're black or white

I said if
You're thinkin' of
Being my baby
It don't matter if you're black or white

I said if
You're thinkin' of
Being my brother
It don't matter if you're
Black or white

Ooh, ooh
Yea, yea, yea now
Ooh, ooh
Yea, yea, yea now

It's black, it's white
It's tough for you
To get by
It's black , it's white, whoo

It's black, it's white
It's tough for you
To get by
It's black , it's white, whoo

Man in the Mirror

I'm gonna make a change,
for once in my life
It's gonna feel real good,
gonna make a diference
Gonna make it right...

As I, turn up the collar on
my favorite winter coat
This wind is blowing my mind
I see the kids in the streets,
with not enought to eat
Who am I to be blind?
Pretending not to see their needs

A summer disregard, a broken bottle top
And a one man soul
They follow each other on the wind ya' know
'Cause they got nowhere to go
That's why I want you to know

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
I'm asking him to change his ways
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change
(Na na na, na na na, na na, na nah)

I've been a victim of a selfish kind of love
It's time that I realize
That there are some with no home, not a nickel to loan
Could it be really me, pretending that they're not alone

A willow deeply scarred, somebody's broken heart
And a washed-out dream
(Washed-out dream)
They follow the pattern of the wind ya' see
'Cause they got no place to be
That's why I'm starting with me

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Ooh!)
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself, and then make a change


I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Ooh!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Change his ways - ooh!)
And no message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make that..
CHANGE!

I'm starting with the man in the mirror
(Man in the mirror - Oh yeah!)
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Better change!)
No message could have been any clearer
(If you wanna make the world a better place)
(Take a look at yourself and then make the change)

(You gotta get it right, while you got the time)
('Cause when you close your heart)
You can't close your... your mind!
(Then you close your... mind!)
That man, that man, that man, that man
With the man in the mirror
(Man in the mirror, oh yeah!)
That man, that man, that man,
I'm asking him to change his ways
(Better change!)
You know... that man
No message could have been any clearer
If you wanna make the world a better place
Take a look at yourself and then make the change
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Na na na, na na na, na na, na nah
(Ooooh...)
Oh no, no no...

I'm gonna make a change
It's gonna feel real good!
Come on!
(Change...)
Just lift yourself
You know
You've got to stop it,
Yourself!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
I've got to make that change, today!
Hoo!
(Man in the mirror)
You got to
You got to not let yourself...
brother
Hoo!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
You know - I've got to get
that man, that man...
(Man in the mirror)
You've got to
You've got to move! Come on!
Come on!
You got to...
Stand up! Stand up! Stand up!
(Yeah! - Make that change)
Stand up and lift yourself, now!
(Man in the mirror)
Hoo! Hoo! Hoo!
Aaow!
(Yeah! - Make that change!)
Gonna make that change...
come on!
You know it!
You know it!
You know it!
You know it...
(Change...)
Make that change.

I'll Be There

You and I must make a pact
We must bring salvation back
Where there is love, I'll be there

I'll reach out my hand to you,
I'll have faith in all you do
Just call my name and I'll be there

Chorus:
And oh - I'll be there to comfort you,
Build my world of dreams around you
I'm so glad that I found you
I'll be there with a love that's strong
I'll be your strength, I'll keep holding on
Yes I will, yes I will

Let me fill your heart with joy and laughter
Togetherness, well that's all I'm after
Whenever you need me, I'll be there
I'll be there to protect you
With an unselfish love I respect you
Just call my name and I'll be there

(Chorus)

If you should ever find someone new
I know he'd better be good to you
'Cos if he doesn't, I'll be there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah
I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be there

(Just look over your shoulders, honey - ooh)

I'll be there, I'll be there, whenever you need me, I'll be
there

Don't you know, baby, yeah yeah
I'll be there, I'll be there, just call my name, I'll be
there...

Blame It On the Boogie

Blame It On The Boogie

Hee, hee, hee, hee

My baby’s always dancin’ and it wouldn’t be a bad thing
But I don’t get no lovin’ and that’s no lie
We spent the night in Frisco at every kinda disco
From that night I kissed our love goodbye

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

That nasty boogie bugs me, but somehow how it has drugged me
Spellbound rhythm gets me on my feet
I’ve changed my life completely, I’ve seen the lightning leave
me
And my baby just can’t take her eyes off me

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t you blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie, woo

I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet
I just can’t, I just can’t (Yeah)
I just can’t (Woo) control my feet

I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet
I just can’t, I just can’t
I just can’t control my feet

Sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

This magic music grooves me, that dirty rhythm fools me
The devil’s gotten to me through this dance
I’m full of funky fever, a fire burns inside me
Boogie’s got me in a super trance

Don’t blame it on the sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Don’t you blame it sunshine
Don’t blame it on the moonlight
Don’t blame it on the good times
Blame it on the boogie

Ow (Sunshine)
Ooh (Moonlight)
Yeah (Good times)
Mmm (Boogie)

You just gotta (Sunshine)
Yeah (Moonlight)
(Good times)
Good times (Boogie)

Don’t you blame it (Sunshine)
You just gotta (Moonlight)
You just wanna (Good times)
Yeah, oh (Boogie)

Blame it on yourself (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie (Good times)
All night long (Boogie)

Can’t stop that boogie (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie (Good times)
Dancin’ all night long (Boogie)

Blame it on yourself (Sunshine)
Ain’t nobody’s fault (Moonlight)
But yours and that boogie, boogie, boogie (Good times)
All night long (Boogie)

~Long live the King of Pop

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life

yeah...i'm over it already =_=. ok not over it....cos it still bothers me heaps.
but if anything, i'm the type who forgets why they were angry to begin with (Y) pathetic isn't it? =_= yeah yeah.

and guess how i'm feeling right now? smitten~! -cue groans, headdesks, and palmfaces-
those 2 of you who know what this is all about, i should get over it shouldn't i? it's quite pathetic. haha...i like using that word now. it's so appropriate. "paTHEtic!" xDDD

-sigh- i'm hopeless. i'm so fking clueless that i probably don't even know how stupid i look from an outsider's POV. in fact, i'm just stupid. full stop. end of story.

ARGH! what's worse is that its one-sided. (Y) yeah great direction this is going isn't it?

since everone is posting up songs on their blogs i should too ^^ nobody knows this song but screw it! its for my own sake ><

presenting!!! -drumroll- the state of my heart >< =_= (the tense isn't right but use your imagination ;P) also the lyrics don't even relate to me....wtf?! =_= I JUST LIKE IT OK! >w<

The Way I Loved You by Taylor Swift

He is sensible and so incredible
And all my single friends are jealous
He says everything I need to hear and it's like
I couldn't ask for anything better
He opens up my door and I get into his car
And he says you look beautiful tonight
And I feel perfectly fine

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name
You're so in love that you act insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breakin' down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

He respects my space
And never makes me wait
And he calls exactly when he says he will
He's close to my mother
Talks business with my father
He's charming and endearing
And I'm comfortable

But I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
And it's 2am and I'm cursing your name
You're so in love that you act insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breakin' down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

He can't see the smile I'm faking
And my heart's not breaking
Cause I'm not feeling anything at all
And you were wild and crazy
Just so frustrating intoxicating
Complicated, got away by some mistake and now

I miss screaming and fighting and kissing in the rain
It's 2am and I'm cursing your name
I'm so in love that I acted insane
And that's the way I loved you
Breaking down and coming undone
It's a roller coaster kinda rush
And I never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you oh, oh

And that's the way I loved you oh, oh
Never knew I could feel that much
And that's the way I loved you

maybe someday, someday when i cant tell you and laugh about it like it's nothing, i'll tell you. for now, just the thought of you is enough.

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, fail, love

hmmm...its funny. all day, i've had depressing songs stuck in my head...

weelay is sick =( hope u get better soon~! thanks for replying today, and sorry i didn't reply in the arvo. (been too tired ><) will call you soon~ "call me, if you need a friend, call me!" ^^

don't really wanna talk about what happened at school today. that sounds worse than i mean it to be xDDD i mean as in...yeah...

netball training: 6 people there yay^^! record (Y) of course...a certain SOMEONE BIGPOOFACE didn't come of course. HAHA melc and melt told us to flame at her for them. they said they were going to stalk her homephone and talk to her parents (Y) serves you right btch.

lenloe lost her flash file D; i can't sympathize cos i don't do ipt, but there's still empathy... the library compnerds couldn't find it either D; well gl with redoing it. got 1 week extension yeah? =) if it helps, i think the vid is really cute :3

D2MG<33

jap reading. pissed that i didn't remember the word for grapes D; othawise (Y)

science me and lenloe r awsome ^_^ us and our non-calculator calculating :3

on a darker note...maybe it's just me...but nothing i do anymore seems to sit right with people. no matter what i do, even if it's alright if other people do it, it's like they HAVE to oppose me. i'm melodramatizing i know...but that's the feeling i'm getting. it's just not fair that i'm being judged cos of what i decide to pursue. there's that judging thing again. yeah, it just seems that nowadays, you have to make everyone else happy before you can think about yourself. yes i'm selfish, deal with it. and it's also not fair that the only un-involved person who seems to be supportive is because she's got that same interest. and on THAT note, THANK YOU~!<33 we both had a bad day (yours was worse of course ><) and i'm glad we pulled through somehow. thank you for being so supportive -hug-

ah...its 6pm. just woke up from falling asleep for 2 hrs >< very exhausted for some reason...

haha yeah... anywayz...where was i? D; oh right. yeah <33 you very much^^

lei dei gum do yee geen, lei dei zi gei hui cham ga la. ngo dei yee ging mun go lei dei go go lah dan hai lei dei zhi gei wa mm hui ga. so yee mm how wa ngo dei mow mun go lei dei ah! mm hai ngo dei go cho lei ga! mm how yee wai ngo mo geen dow lei dei yi ga heng dow 'bar' gun ngo ah.

ARGH SHIT...got so much crap to finish before thursday.
ok...TO DO LIST!

*Drama Journal - fked for cos i havnt started and need to do a term's worth of entries before thursday D;
*SRP Log Book - also fked for cos i'm capped and can't do research x(
*Jap notes for me/lenloe - shouldn't be too hard. killing 2 birds with one stone (Y)
*English Script for Mice and Men - GROUP MEETING GUYS!!! D;

still not quite satisfied with that rant. might post again tonight. if bothered.

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, friends, life, school

ok yes i know i epic fail T_T right after "getting back on track" i have failed again. well got shit net to blame ^^;; yeah and also being very cbf and late nights (Y) -sigh- ok here we go...MASS recap again D;

~Friday June 26 2009~
carumen-chan sick. get beta soon~!

nothing much during the day. 1st period maths; the usual. Do the work in class then never do hw (Y) well i guess venn diagrams and two way tables are't THAT bad =_=. oh well, in all uneventful.

English, as usual: BLUDGE xDDD ok well we were supposed to be doing work. developing of mice and men into play @_@ and we have till (as of today) this thursday/friday to finish the scene (Y) fked yes. AHAHAHAHA ms seeto and her "tree blowing in the wind -waves arms around- river -octopus arms in front- and dead squashed mouse -cowers under arms-" xDDDDDD oh well...the freaking year 7/8 in te gym who repeatedly played Unfaithful by Rihanna weren't helping >[. we ended up talking about formal i think xDDD

Recess...i'm sorry T_T it was too long ago so i don't remember....><

Drama, yes we got congratulated yadayadayada. then we did commedia (Y) why do i always end up t=playing the old men? D; last year i did the big fat doctor, this time i get to be the captain wuss. T_T my neck hurts from being slammed on the 'bed' so many times xDDDD

Lunch: cath and shirley had brandy snap ^w^ like caramel toffee except chewy >w< very yummy. then there was the cool chocolate squiggly things (Y) xDDD love scabbing off ft ppl ^w^

History was dodge!! xDDD had mr culver for a sub, then spent the rest of the lesson copying steph/angel's work to 'check off'. >< hey i actually forgot my folder!! not my fault D; ok it is ><

science was fail cos i didnt have my folder D;. need to copy notes off weelay >< trivia...got owned xDDD

after school had rehearsal for Gala night concert. freaking jnr choir...JUST COS U HAVE SO MANY PPL...D; i only realised how small snr vocal and yr 10 vocal are when we were on stage... haha oh well. i hate singing the chorus in 'in the mood' D; so hard to get the rght note for the first line. and STILL cant get the freaking lyrics... "oh JOY, FLOY DOY, oh BOY!" OMGOMGOMGOMG >[ newayz. then we had a bit of a fail self-conducted rehearsal outside. >< alto 2's so outnumbered...FOUR! FOUR OF US!! D;

went back inside to watch jnr choir singing glory of love xDD tried recording it...then roser kept restarting them at "OOOOOOHAAAAAHHH BABADOOBOW~!" garg i ended up with like 10 vids of them doing that >[. then lenloe and weelay went out making a fashion statement with their skirt tops xDDD very nice guys (Y)

had chick'n grill for dinner ^w^ shared potatobake with weely (Y) then changing in the civic centre toilets O_O got perved on...freaking fail lock on the cubicle door...YOU COULD TURN IT FROM OUTSIDE >[. gargh...

got back to gala, got more and more high ^w^. cam high xDDD cool vids of people singing. GIB FTW! (girls in black ><) xDDD yes i will upload these on fb as soon as i'm not capped D;

i think we sang alrite...i hope we sang alright O_O season of love = <33. i still felt like i was off tune in in the mood >< damn man. and apparently i was RIGHT next to the podium mic so...YES I WAS AMPLIFIED T__________T bro and stella both said they could hear me D; gargh....

speaking of my bro...HIS NAME GOT DRAWN FOR THE RAFFLE HAMPER!!! xDDD lucky betch...

yesh that's all for friday...FINALLY! dw...it's the weekend now, won't be too long ;P

~Saturday June 27 2009~
Netball. What else? xDDD Year 9 babies (haha ok that's weird calling them that O_O) my year 9 team are AWESOME! i don't care if monte steroids beat you...it was only by TWO! 2 POINTS I TELL YOU! so you're still awesome!! ^w^ and also good job thrashing wenona^^

as for my own team...apparently we plyed well, despite losing...as always >< oh well i play for the ake of playing (Y) xDD currently VERY pissed at DAIS for skipping out...FREAKING HELL IF YOU'RE GONNA SIGN UP THEN COMMIT TO THE TEAM! JEEZ! fking slacker...i feel sorry for our coach.

watched a bit of coaches' game afterwards. PRO-NESS~! >< so good^^ melt is an awesome defender...she puts her body on the line as melc said xDDD and melc is so aggro its scary xDDD but its good (Y)

went a little looking around at chats afterwards. pretty light bluey aqua dress with reali nice colour and material (chiffon)...but in 2 sizes too big D; and mum says it makes me look fat (Y) (foto...didnt actually buy it ><)

ok thats all thank god.

~Sunday June 28 2009~

err...forgot what i did...

OH THATS RIGHT!! lol it as only yesterday >< ok...so...woke up at 11:30...got out of bed at 11:30 i think >////< then me and mum went to eastwood to do stuff (Y) where i got new haircut ^w^. fringe...wow...3rd time in life having a fringe (Y) (2-3 yrs old, beginning of yr 8, and now) feels weird...i looked down at the floor and there was like a WHOLE FRIKKN PILE of hair xDDDDD i think hairdresser must've been tired xDD (blue star<33) he sed i shud come back every 3 months. guy knows how to do business xDDDD but no D; like i'd be stuffd ><

went with mum to cafe de macau of lunch/arvo tea, and had cheapass arvo tea set xDDD. but twas nice ^w^ (buttermilk pancakes with deep fried chicken wings, potato salad and...something else xDDD + red bean ice ^w^)

procrastinated wen i got home (Y) webcammed with weelay and she liked the cut xDDD reaction was funny xDDD

FINALLY!! ~Monday June 29 2009~
YES! FINALLY! WOOH! ok fine ill get on with it ><

uhm...got 2 school earli for scram. saw ms achelle, nobodythere yet D;.
then ness got here, and i went out of comp room and said hi xDDDD she didn't reply D; after the 3rd hi, she's like "OH! OMG I DIDN'T RECOGNISE YOU!" hehe...score 1!

scrammed. people late xDDD (Y) gg guys^^

drama presented the commedia play. argh i fail as a man (Y) which is...normal? xDD the other group's play was absolutely hilarious xDDD

geo, still managed to not present our ppt (Y) hehe relying on handouts... -shift-

Ate my lunch at recess T_T fail~

Commerce: watched the case bout lindy chamberlain. so horrible D;

ah...its 12:01am...GOOD MORNING EVRYONE xDDDDD (Y)

Lunchtime did commerce with log and Elaie...well watched them do commerce >< didnt help much D;

Rollerblading = LAST LESSON! D; will missh you TOM~! so instead we did cool tricks all day ^w^ Tom brought out the big boys (rip stick, skateboard, scooters, and lots of other kool stuff) and offered $50 to whoever could ride those funny metal wheel things...>< nobody could (Y) THEN ME AND CARUMEN-CHAN DID THE RAMP ON BLADES!! ^w^ SO FUN!! xDDDDDDD stacked it on the bum the first time though =\ tried to show shirley the ropes, then she got grazed D; stupid loose pads...

me and weelay changed for dance (hehe weelay...SAGGY PANTS! xDDD) then took train to central with bella. we started doing this weird bobbing thing ("yo sup!" -bobbobobob-)xDDD to do to cdrew (hehe not sus at all) if we bumped into him. got to central, saw lots of sbs...no cdrew D; poor weelay. friends of her saw him, and friends of his saw her, but they missed each other. yes next time we'll need 2 change earlier xDDD.

waited 4 yale and lawrence for a while, walked a long way to...bookshop? =\ yeh wth xDDD bella and weelay avid fans of the 'SEX' section xDDDDDD leave me out of this guys xDDD bella left halfway through.

we then walked around to chinatown, where we went into a dodgy coffee lounge with betchy waitresses =\ food wasnice though (chicken and mushroom omelette ^w^). red bean ice was quite literally...RED BEAN + ICE...(ok throw in a bit of milk there). >< very dodge (Y) cdrew a bit dow gei by now ;P yale and lawrence apparently didnt wanna come up to top floor, but then we were broke (ok short...not broke xDDD) so we went (yes, down) to ask yale to borrow. ended up coming back up, after we decided lawrence wasn't gonna jump out othe toilets off the building xDDDD yale is so...(communist) azn xDDD (Y) shouted us. THANK YOU~!

yale and lawrence 'walked' us to dancekool...then decided to come up after seeing the bookshop sign in the same building =_= yaow di gwai gwai shu shu...=\

dance was awesome fun today ^w^ not noob is a good feeling (Y). jaye so cute ^w^ no i'm not hitting on him...he's shorter than me i think xDDDD must check next time. and was quite tired afterwards cos we werent lost today so we could go full out! wooh hi5 weelay!

saw liwai gege while walking to town hall xDDD haha random. i wonder if he thought i was a random, since the hair didn't help. xDD

a very special person taught me tonight/this morning to have more faith in guys. i guess i should. haha but...it's so ironic...>w< nvm. tonight, someone made me very happy. i don't know if you'll ever read this, but thanks.

Labels: emotions, fail, friends, school

yeah...it took a while but im bak -dramatic music-

so...today... was late to snr vocal cos i had an argument with mum T_T sorry guys...but vocal was fun^^ we're kinda screwd 4 gala...oh well? xDDD and omg T_T apparently ppl aren't coming 2 gala anymore~! T_T like...carumen-cahn cant come...lenloe can't come, celia wont come, elaine wont come, weelay wont come, and...T____________T im gonna be all alone!!! please come ppl...otherwise you woke up early all those days for NOTHING! GOT TO SCHOOL AT 8 FOR NOTHING~! =(

history...so freakng exhausted from last night. _T lenloe hit me with a book on the head >< you coud've just shaken me awake T_T meanie~ xDD

geo: epic fail~ xDDDD we like fully ignored mr passlow. (D; not coswe're mean...we were just reali er...cbf? we got ONE presentation done in the WHOLE period xDDDDD fail much?

at recess...ms mcmahon and seeto made us clean up from drama night. =_= as if we werent tired enugh. had fun squishing boxes to put in recycling xDD (Y) the bell rung as soon as i got to the atom D;

english was SUCH a bludge xDDD...as always? ;P yay^^ we're doing a play for mice and men...i dont noe why im happy bout that but i am? >< beta than writing...we're doing the scene where curley's wife gets killed =O JESS BE LENNIE~! xDDDDD

forgot to buy a hoodie at lunch T_T MUST remember tomorrow. with carumen-chan helped lenloe revise for jap 'listening' test at lunchtime (ended up being reading xDDDD (Y) ) my chicken tender wrap = <33 ^w^ thnk yu mum for being an AWESOME cook xDDD

maths...got busted T_________T i reali didnt notice myself falling asleep T_T it was relai stuffy.... and no steffu...it wasnt ur fault either ;P D; btu srsly...i feel reali bad. it shudnt be your job to wake me up steffu T_T i REALLY need to sleep... anywayz...miss v fully owned me D; embrassing...

commerce...err...pseaud (still don't know how to spell her name =_=) ctl. saw weelay and bella doing mando (Y)so exhausted that i fell asleep >< IM SORRYYYYYYYYYYY~!! T_T drama night killed me >< then after, turned out that weelay gave me bak the rong PE shirt xDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD ikenw it felt different ;P now i need to dig through all my dodge laundry and find it (Y) xDDD

must persuade al to go formal shopping ^w^

talked on mobile wth lenloe/carumen-chan/elaine/celia/kenneth whie walking home xDDDD V2V FREE MINUTES FTW~! ^w^ clara and my brother sed i looked crazy cos i was talking o myyself T_____T JUST COS I WAS USING EARPHONES DAMNIT!! D;

yay for banana walnut muffins straight out of the oven ^w^

GOOD LUCK ALL IPTers/E.HISTORY PPL!! (esp. Lenloe!) GANBATTE~!

edit: lenloe didnt hit me with a book - it was her hand xDDDD and she didnt do it on purpose <33

~<33 beedee

Labels: friends, life, school

yes...i know i know...i fail T_T almost a week without posting.

sorry... i just really hav been cbf. i've been bored/busy so...yeah you get the point.

so...brief recap of days missed:
*Saturday - netball cancelled (woot! a bit cbf on the day =_=) cos of the rain. spent the rest of day procrastinating.

*Sunday - FORMAL SHOPPING!!!<33 went to bondi junction with weelay and steffu. i wasn't late!!! ^_^ caught bus from townhall there. so fail iceskaters xDDDD DOMINO EFFECT!! xDDDDDD and we thought up a way of getting everone off the ice >w<: remotely lift the ice up and tip everyone off (Y)

xDDD got to bondi and were like O_O how do you get to westfield. found the place eventually (Y). Freaking huge place it is, like...rich-ass people D; wandered around a bit: nice shops, dodgy shops, hardcore shops, pretty dresses, holey dresses.

In DJs we camwhored with mac comps xDDD hilarious fx (Y) ^w^ FREAKING HELL Steffu ur so skinny D; so jealous~ T_T what's tight on me is like LOOSE on you D; anywayz, CHANGEROOM SESSION! ^^ tried on a few dresses including dodgy red dress which was WAAAAY too low xDDD AH! and gradient dresses<33 xDDDD freaking expensive though. and the 'shelly' dress<33 i think the shop staff person was like "O_o wtf are they doing in there?" cos she asked us if we were ok a few times -shifty- xDD.

i think we then went to lunch. had okonomiyaki (jap pancake)<33 ^w^ yummy^^ and steffu and weelay had nachos -shift- and since i was still hungry got a taco as well (Y) and weelay and steffu asked for the wiggly chips so bought those to share (Y) really yummy~ ^w^

then went to myer<33 if was to give any advice, definitely the best place to look for dresses ^w^ not including formal shops i guess. when i was looking back on the photos i took while we tried dresses on...its so funny how many shots there are of renee half out of a dress xDDDD camera loves you ;P and steffu not fitting into boob(y) dresses xDDDDD covered up for the fotos (Y)pretty wedding-like dress and steffu's cute navy wavy dress (ahahaha i just realised how funny that sounds) then we wnt with steffu to go to rubi shoes for black flats, but didnt get them.

and evntually...ended up getting one from myer (Y). sorry i took so long deciding weelay D; haha and the boob-hole dress xDDDD nice colour though<33

so...yay? ^^

*monday: I WAS EARLY FOR SNR VOCAL!!! BOOYAH! >< ok its not that big of a deal. but its a big achievement >< and the i was very fascinated by vianna's ring-watch xDDD
then we had a full dress rehearsal which ran through 2nd period...uhm...wgat else...ah maths! ^^ miss v bak! proper teacher -shift- but now i have to do work >< cos the teacher actually knows me.

rollerblading quite normal. tom wasn't late ;P had a 'test' whre evryone 'passed' xDD dodgy exercises....AND OMG! FLARTING sed to carumen-chan "stop showing off!!!" in an authorative teacherish voice. betch...as if you're not. "oh...wait is this how you do it?" jeez...WE pay school fees to do this you know!!! go to manly skates and find tom if you're so despo!! >[ besides you're taking away our learning time >P haha^^ rant much?

then me and Weelay went dance. so hungry we wanted something to eat. so we bought train tickets first to be sure...then SHIT! we onli had 55c xDDDD so we went to maccers and saw JOJO!^w^ wanted a discount but she was broke D; so we shared a soft serve xDDDDDDDDDDDDD and ate it with spoons. >w< must've looked reali awkward and weird, cos we were walking down george st while eating it xDDD.

so yeah, dance...one word...FAIL~! D; couldn't even find the place xDDD we were SO lost >< then we got there...and SO freaking intimidating D; all ppl such pros...and we were just like O_O yup (Y) we're...uh...new...so...O_O xDDD completely lost >< met a nice girl called trish (uni sudent) who helped us<33 even during warmup we were unco xDD then came the routine D; i was so hopeless. kept doing the wrong moves.

jaye is nice (Y) xDDD like a kid. he's got a reali cute face too >w< and NO i am not perving on the dance teacher O_o heh heh...not at all -shift- xDDD nah he's kool (Y) he says we should be more sexy than him when dancing....O_O bullcrap! like that's possible!! he's so frekaing pro D; anyway. in all it was really fun ^w^ can't wait till next lesson. meanwhile gotta practice the routine. ganbarimasu~

and since we starved ourselves being poor, i got home and STUFFD my face (Y) ^^

*tuesday: hmm...what happened...oh that's right. got to school early...crashed IPTers >< then...i thought scram wasn't on cos i thought it was in ft1 T_T sorry guys. then during non-scripture gen-earth had bake sale and scabbed off ppl (stil hadn't refilled wallet from yesterday xDDD) assembly very -packed- lots of vids ^w^ epic drama night vid. OMG!!! ^w^ yr 12 snr challenge encore hiphop dancers SO AWSOME!!! D; then they said there'd be hiphop from nxt term onwards (found out tday its gonna be $8) wanna go~ besides gotta lose wight (Y) workout~! wooh~ ^^

uhm...jap no test -phew- commerce started group assessment. D; i dont think L really likes E and S much...i dont know why D; buti dont wanna tell her not to... since it's up to her. but, argh i dont know ><. drama, focus and random exercises in ampitheatre. ms mcmahon is SO fking scary T_T and geo AHAHAHA fully crammed during lunchtime to do presentation...then didn't do it xDDDDD pseaud (or however the hell you spell her name) had us (Y) studied multiculturalism =_=

*thank you chandrew for being a kind/sweet bf for weelay, so we could've ( if we had) do presentation ^^

thank you mum for buying pretty shoes^w^

wednesday: netball before school - only 3 people turned up >< terry needs to be more aggro!! >< GANBATTE~! full day drama reheasal. freaking running behind schedule. like an HOUR behind schedule. =_= fail. plays turned out pretty well. i think i'm blinded by all teh stage lights. -blinkblink- and then me and niki got spung a polished impro to fill in an interlude...FREKAING HELL! like the AFTERNOON before the SHOW!! T_T suck at impro...but we got it down ^^ was really annoed that they threw out all the bacon mash potato after full dress rehearsal D; it was NICE~!<33 then they threw all the dirty cutlery in T______T NOOOOO~ MA MASH~!

ordered and picked up pizza after school with elaine, wheeza and emily. ^w^ hahaha simply CHEEEEEEEEEESE<33 and the fail double bacon chesseburger which we found an OLIVE in!! xDDDD so fail~ this BLACK thing in the middle of the slice. we were like O_O...BWAHAHAHAHA!! xDDD newayz, it was kool, just eating pizza and chatting ^w^ and go em's little brother daniel...could hear him on phone "...yeah." xDDD

had so much time to waste before the performance. then got into costume. powdered hair with baby powder >< the smelled horrible. and then everytime i tapped my head this cloud of smoke would fly out xDDD and i just realised how hard it is bein a girl being a guy. cos for guys normally wen they go toilet they just -open-. but for girls you have to undo belt, sit down, .....-something-.... stand up, tuck shirt in whiel trying not to tuck suit jacket in, redo belt, then flush. -panting- frekaing hell, takes longer than being a girl. =_= hair colour kept 'fading apparently' so jihu and cici (well more jihu xDDDD) went crazy with the powder. hopefullyhad the right effect =L

then the night started!! (DC came ^w^ reali surprised =O) opened the show...me and niki so nervous. almost cracked up while i was walking down the aisle xDDDD niki did awsome opening speech.

other class's plays were awesome. LOVED the maccers one<33 so funny. ting and judy so epic. the dirnks were scary D; T______T so creeped out...poor mish xDDDD got fully owned.

then at interval me and niki 'mingled' xDDD supposed to stay in character...failed at that (Y) argh my hair was so embarassing T_T. then we opened second part of night after interval. my argument with niki (the polished impro). so freaking scared i wud stuff it up. but the audience laughed!!!!<33 ^_^ thank god...

me yourself and i...REALLY wanted to see it on stage T_T but cast weren't allowed to in the crowd...but the audience liked it so...hopefully it was good? still...really wanted to see my script being performed T_T oh well, i saw bits of it during rehearsals<33 love that cute scene at the end where elaine and wheeza go off holding hands<33 good job guys (Y)

corner store, beginning is so epic xDDD its like...they're so random that you got to laugh xDD ah stella and wendy. such a deep play =O. REALLY good job - only 2 actors man!

and then us...OMG!!! T_T was so fking nervous...couldn't think straight. the audience got into it with the rock music 'radio' at the beginning xDDDD could hear them clapping in time ^^ wonder if joy was 'bobbing' =L i stuffed up 2 lines T_T. i dont think the audience laughed as much as we would've liked them to...but then again i supposed our play isn't that funny. and then they were like "ooooooooooh" wwhen the bowl smashed xDDD yay. and guess what?! i broke the glass when i slammed the table xDDD didn't even realise till we were cleaning up. >< anywayz...i hope they liked it ^w^ cutain call was so epic...half of them didn't what to do cos the other class wasn't here when we rehearsed it =_= oh well...(apparently DC was gonna run up on stage xDDDD funny guy...)

afterwards met up with cath, lenloe, weelay, carumen-chan, steffu and DC. hope they liked it...? then we had 2 pack up...so freking tired. cbf.

went home fell asleep.

and guesswat?! i havnt even written for TODAY yet D; i'll do it in anuther post.

i am NEVER recapping again. T_T

~<33 beedee

Labels: fail, friends, life, school

...what do you do when mutual interests clash?

that sounded a bit dodge...but i guess that kinda sums it up. can't say what it's actually about...but let's say...there's only one of one thing...and you and your friend both desire it... what happens from there? D;

i should back away. i probably will. in fact, my friend probably as more right to it anyway. i'm just an outsider. i don't know...it seems for some reason unfair if i go for it now. perhaps it's a sense of obligation? >< i don't know...

it's just that when i think about this...i feel majorly unconfortable and...i don't know >< HELP ME~!!!!

edit: i just realised how stupid this sounds...well lets just say its a lot more complicated than i've made it sound ><

Labels: emotions, friends

not much to say...cso wasn't with u guys for most of today D;

late 2 snr vocal T_T felt like an idiot walking in like that...>< sorry 2 let u guys down...and more dodgy actions (Y) xDDDDD

carumen chan and elena - hope u weren't lonely today D;

commerce excursion in city - tagged along with elaine, sally and log^^ weather was reali fail =_= started raining wen we walked 2 circular quay...and yay 4 heavier bag cos i brought an umbrella (Y) xDD. law courts - not enugh time >< fell asleep in one of the cases T_T and the security guard caught me...sleeping...and teased me for it as i went out T^T yeah i need 2 start sleeping... >[ justice and police museum, Judy is (Y) at court monitoring xDDDD hilarious. theres so many disturbig cases, esp the murder ones... 8 yr old kid man!! D; R.I.P all of you. ><

hot hawaiian pizza is nice on a winter's afternoon (Y) ;d

uneventful day, uneventful post D; hopefully will have more to write about soon~

~<33 beedee

Labels: life

yes we are men (Y) xDDD as ms cleggie says.

*edit for yesterday: CARUMEN-CHAN wearing STOCKINGS!! ^_^ 1st time in 4eva! very fem (Y)

hmm...i dont remember wat we did 2day?

oh thats right. i am discovering the art of T9 (Y) haha not really O_O. just that after 6 years of using a mobile phone, i am finally admitting that i am a slow txter (Y) so last night i finally surrendered to T9 and spent an hour adding words to dictionary...sad much? xDDD

this morning...late T_T literally saw the last train that would get me to school on time leave the platform as i ran down the stairs. "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" (cue slow motion playback, zoom in on train leaving andhand outreached) yes i'm feeling very melodramatic today xDDD. then, after, got to maths and seniors drag me off to report a late school bus. xDDD shifty yeah. oh well. got off a late note so (Y). ^_^

then lo and behold! guess who the sub-sub (sub for sub of miss v ;D) is? ^_^ its the maths sub we stalked in the quad last year on Jeans for genes day!! yes i still have the vid (Y) which was also the day carmen ghosted BRADY xDDDD. yeah, the one who busted me for filming her...T_T thank gawd she didn't recognise me...and then i bludged maths (Y) as always. didn't bother sinning, cosing or tanning (Y) xDDD

hmmm...science....BLUDGE!!! xDDD yes....txtbook work 4 half an hour (*note, Celia sings a lot of the things she says ;D very cute) then 'help setting up for yr 12 prac test' (which took...half a minute?) then HALF AN HOUR OF (literally Mr Kulesz said: ) BLUDGE!!! woot! xDDDD me and weelay went walkabout (Y) and then 3 of us (lenloe, weelay and me) talk about guys -coughspecificsomeonecough- and different types of 'love'...haha yeah - comittment, passion, intimacy and 'perfect' (yeh i know right? perfect my ass =_=)

guys having girl bestfriends are so hopeless =_= get a clue man...

the talk about guys got me thinking: why do guys think we're so complex? well...i guess maybe we are...but...aren't guys kinda complicated as well? well...some of them -shift-. hey don't blame me, i haven't exactly had the experience ><. well maybe its cos i'm naive, but personally i never have been able to read guys. not that it try to xDDD "I don't attempt to understand the male mind!" ;P -sigh- gawd i dont know...maybe i DO need a bf =_= i don't deny that i'd like the intimacy...>w< like i've said...i'm a srsly hopeless romantic...like to be loved ^w^. but i dont know if i'm ready for a relationship either. i just don't know how i'd fare in a relationship. =\ i'm also really scared of being rejected O_O selfish i know, but its the truth. so socially deprived =_= wait...wth am i talking about? sad much? >< -sigh- jeez i'm not the expert here...;P

yay^^ snr vocal and yr 10 acapella both get group fotos this yr^_^ vball too...>< but i dont know if im included in that D; we should have peer mediation/SCRAm photos too~! >] oh well ><

wet atom at recess D; decided on going formal shopping this Sunday? or was it Saturday? O_O well me Weelay and Steffu newayz. Nemore takers? xDDD planning on going bondi j <33 and strand again mebbe?

PE touch footy...haha fun^_^ our team owns! xDDD then we had

double english after lunch >< you know i still haven't read past chapter one in mice and men =_= THAT's how fail i am (Y) gg much? and hence...yeah i haven't started the 3 pages of questions we're supposed to do either (Y) Ms Seeto rambled again xDDD this time about food/ex-schools taught at. hehe "Of Mice and Men is important because its about the LACK of CAKES~!" xDDD
*TO ALL THOSE NOT IN 10B: how do you pronounce the following name: LA-A xDDDDDDD hav fun xDDD

Then wide reading...omg we're fucked T_T 2 weeks till assessment!! i only JUST starteed Dracula damnit!!! D;

talked to Al about formal on train ^_^ she said she might not go D; she BETTER go!!! >]

stuffed my face when i got home... the pizza for dinner later =_= i'll be lucky if i don't upsize when we got formal shopping this wkend >< REALLY need those hiphop lessons (Y) can't wait!!! ^w^

commerce excursion tomorrow =_= so pointless...plus we have to take notes for assignment as well T_T law courts...woot O_o i can't believe we miss out on mufti AND teacher theatresports for THIS T_T

newayz. that's all for today? feel like writing more... maybe i'll post again later tonight (Y) ok seeya soon~!

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life, love, school

not much to say today. =\

ISCF concert was pretty cool. ^_^ i'm not religious or anything, but i was really happy to see jassy and all the iscf/scripture people having so much fun and so passionate about their religion. no seriously, they looked so, at peace (apart from the blaring loud music in the background xDDD). The band was awesome as well - the songs they played were very meaningful and...catchy? xDDD <33 keep smiling guys!!

got raped at lunch =) ok the combination of that dodgy sentence and the emote make it SUPER dodge but meh. xDD and NO we were not raping each other ;P you WISH we were xDDD jokes jokes. 'you cannot rape the willing' ;P nah...i'm just very ticklish that's all >< then got gangbanged in the end O_O xDDD

commerce...screw the new semester assignment T_T 30 frikkn % weighting... and first part starts on thursday wen we go to court xDDD yes we are all convicted =O

drama night soon~ >< street theatre on monday...gonna be owned T_T dont laugh, please guys. oh and also!!^^ not that there hasn't been enough promotion, but COME TO DRAMA NIGHT PPL!!! ^_^ we wanna fill up the whole hall!!

thanks to bella for lending me her coat.<33 twas very warm ^w^ apparently i look authorative in it xDDD i think i look fat D; yes, even black cant save me ><

yay for people who walk home in the rain! ^_^ <33cath and lauren

~<33 beedee

Labels: emotions, life, school

Labels: fail, friends, life

argh F**K! all of what it typed just got deleted!!! T_T great way to start yeah? T_T ok so...-sigh- starting again...

11:17pm, 14th June 2009: officially start blogging^^lame title much? ><><>[went to work today. nah nothing impressive. just working for dad at comp market. need the pay though. fully broke after not working during musical T_T. i should find a part time. year 10 is expensive^^;;

tomorrow...is school...haha no shataye? >< damn i'm screwed...so what have i got?
*drama - costume and costume design (crap...T_T damn drama night)
*geo - errr...hw? (not that i'll do it =_= i'm just writing this so that when i reread this post i'll feel guilty...as i should! T_T)
*commerce - errr...bring in excursion note? jeez we've only been watching law videos =_=
*sport - rollerbalding!! er... = bring deo? xDD wait...wat?! O_O no...bLAding xDDD

yay^^ Weelay wants 2 go dance next week!! -hug- i really am happy. i actually enjoy dancing ^w^ and also cos i've never actually learnt non-ballet/contemporary dance before. i've always wanted to learn hiphop...but i guess nobody really cares right? ^^;; well whatever, it's just that it would be nice to start learning again after 5 years. yes xDDD contrary to common belief, i haven't learnt dance in 5 years. so it'll be nice to start again <33 thank u weelay!!

craving chocolate. hehe...yes that lindt bunny WOULD look a lot more attractive without the ears. hmm how about without the head? xDDD see...THIS is why i had trouble zipping up the size [...] dress (although xDDD that zipper didn't zip up that well even when i wasnt in it) -sigh- damn my sweet tooth.

ah...yeah there is one more thing i should say. i really <33 my group. i'm not saying this cos i wanna be patronized. i really do think they're the awesomest ever. i honestly can say that i've never been happier with other another group of school friends. i'm not saying they're perfect - who IS O_o? but...i wouldn't change a single one of them. Because...they make me who i am. and they've helped me...grow? O_O ok no...xDD more like mature. ironic isn't it? i'm the oldest xDDD

argh crap. mum/dad turned off the net. i'll probably go turn it back on just so i can post this...but i have to wait till their lights are off. -sigh- see? i'm a bad kid D;

oh f**k....just realised....reports tomorrow T_T oh fml ^^;;

hmm...yeah i tihnk that's all for now. to anybody bothered reading this: how's that? hope i didn't bore you to tears ><

so this is be[d] signing out for the first time, at 11:49pm!^^ cu again soon!!<33

Labels: friends, life